Wednesday, December 21, 2011

December - the month of Holiness and Faith

MDA Merry Christmas and test results

Had to go back to MDA to do MRIS and CT Scan on chest and Abdomen last week (12/15 & 12/16)  and see docs and get results. We got good news and not so good news. The good news was the tumor in my next that was treated with 10 radiation treatments had shrunk and that's why I wasn't haven't as much pain there. The even better news was that the radiation to the brain, 5 treatments, had also worked and the lesions were dead. This was music to my ears cause I was so afraid that if it didn't work I would become blind because of where the tumor was and unable to see my children and nieces and nephews continue to grow up, go to prom, or be married. I felt so blessed and that my prayers had been answered and then the bad news. I had 2 new tumors on my spine. 1 on my T10 and another 1 on my L4. The one on the T10 is in between the vertebra's that were taken out and redone in cement and rods so it cant grow up or down and is the least of our problems. The L4 is the one that is the most dangerous and will cause me to be paralyzed quite quickly. I had known for the past week and a half or so that something wasn't right. I could tell that my right leg (the bad leg) had gotten weaker and was harder to move and lift when in a standing position. BUT what really had me worried was the left leg (also known as the Good Leg) had become so much weaker. It was becoming harder to put all my weight onto it and it was harder to lift of the bed. I just knew in my gut something wasn't right and that I would find out it was another tumor and I hate that I was right. As of today (12/21) I am much weaker and can't use the walker at all cause I just can't stand. Wayne does a great job transferring me to and from the chair to the bed and the chair to the car. Thank God for him and his patience that's for sure. I spoke to Dr Rao and he felt that radiation could be done and wanted to speak to my radiation oncologist Dr Settle and see what could be done (this was on Friday). First thing Monday morning, Dr Settle called to say I was able to do 10 treatments on my spine and he felt that the risk of becoming paralyzed in the next 12 months with radiation was 10% and without is 100%, and it's already happening. So Wayne and I will be leaving for MDA again on Jan 3 to start radiation. Between chemo and radiation and travel and everything in between I feel as though I am in a dream. I can't believe how much my life has changed and how fast. It's as if God has just taken over and I have no say so anymore. I am so blessed to be here and so blessed that all my prayers have been heard. But, they are being answered in God's Time. The one thing I can tell you is that HIS TIME is  bit different that MINE lol. Hopefully I will get good results on the liver CT and chest scan. I don't know why its taking so long to see those reports, but when I get them I will post them. I can only pray now that December gets better and that everyone's Christmas is healthy, and blessed and so special. I hope my friends look at their own families and truly thank God for everything they have this Christmas, but more over that they look at their family year round and be thankful for what they have. We are so lucky for so much and that thankfulness should come year round not once a year. I am Blessed to have my parents, I don't know where we would be right now without my Mom and Pop. And I have such an awesome Husband that has chosen to stay with me through sickness and in health. He could have easily walked away or chosen to have me go live with my parents but, he didn't, instead he couldn't wait to get me home and take care of me. My kids have surprisingly been willing to learn how to help me and they make sure I take my meds and my legs get rubbed and they come and lay down by me. They have been great. My sister really surprised me by even learning how to give me a shot. This was huge I tell ya. I would have never thought she would do anything like this. She really has come through for me and I love her. my friends have made sure that my family is fed and my kids get where they need to be since I cant drive. I couldn't do it without Jina, Alicia, Gwyn, Andrea, Kelly, Danielle, Donna. You girls are my Angels and I love you so much. You all have made my December just a little bit merrier and I wont ever forget it. And last but not least my home health team, Christy, Claire and Rachel. I appreciate your patience, your kindness and hard work. You have each put up with me and I am very happy to have each of you helping me. May you all have a Blessed and Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. I have lots more to write about under separate headings so stay tuned, the next topic will be Sr Dulce of Baton Rouge, a story for believers and non believers to be transformed to a believer.......

1 comment:

  1. You are amazing Ellen, and an inspiration to all. Keep the faith girl, you're gonna beat this!